Phase 5
Darby had left many worrisome voicemails on my answering machine. I felt terrible for not realizing and responding…
“No new messages.” The machine said after twenty minutes of voicemails. I obviously needed to call Darby. Before I could dial her number, the phone rang. I quickly picked it up and in a hurry I said, “Darby! I’m so sorry.”
“Darby?” The voice said. “This isn’t Darby.”
“Oh my God…” My heart began to pound, my lips started to tremor and my fingers became weak. My eyes started to hurt as they began to water. “Den…” I bit my bottom lip and held my tongue. I felt the sweat roll down my back as I finished, “…zel?”
“Denzel?” The voice said, “This isn’t Denzel either! Oh please, don’t tell me you’ve forgotten!” I let out a staggered sigh, so relieved. I then took a breath and said, “who is this?”
“Lucas.”
Lucas. Memories began to flood my mind. Dated in high school, what a schmuck. …Were connected through college by email and phone… Then we dropped off the face of the Earth from each other. He went to Mass and I went to Calif.
“Oh my God, Lucas?” I said, “Holy… Wow! How are you doing?”
“Maybe we can get together…” He said.
“What?” I asked, twiddling my thumbs, “I’m not anywhere near you, you know that.”
“I came to San Francisco, believe it or not. Job offers with the government work, you know.” He was quiet.
“Wow!” I said, “Well that’s great, right? How is your job?”
…..
We decided to meet at a night club several blocks from my house tomorrow night. I finally had a reason to wear my new short, red sparkling dress. It’d be fun…
…..
“No new messages.” The machine said after twenty minutes of voicemails. I obviously needed to call Darby. Before I could dial her number, the phone rang. I quickly picked it up and in a hurry I said, “Darby! I’m so sorry.”
“Darby?” The voice said. “This isn’t Darby.”
“Oh my God…” My heart began to pound, my lips started to tremor and my fingers became weak. My eyes started to hurt as they began to water. “Den…” I bit my bottom lip and held my tongue. I felt the sweat roll down my back as I finished, “…zel?”
“Denzel?” The voice said, “This isn’t Denzel either! Oh please, don’t tell me you’ve forgotten!” I let out a staggered sigh, so relieved. I then took a breath and said, “who is this?”
“Lucas.”
Lucas. Memories began to flood my mind. Dated in high school, what a schmuck. …Were connected through college by email and phone… Then we dropped off the face of the Earth from each other. He went to Mass and I went to Calif.
“Oh my God, Lucas?” I said, “Holy… Wow! How are you doing?”
“Maybe we can get together…” He said.
“What?” I asked, twiddling my thumbs, “I’m not anywhere near you, you know that.”
“I came to San Francisco, believe it or not. Job offers with the government work, you know.” He was quiet.
“Wow!” I said, “Well that’s great, right? How is your job?”
…..
We decided to meet at a night club several blocks from my house tomorrow night. I finally had a reason to wear my new short, red sparkling dress. It’d be fun…
…..
“Kane…”
“Yeah.”
“Need, uh, more.”
“Yeah right, you can’t-.”
“Yes I can, that’s not a problem.”
“… fine. You know where to find me. Just leave the money there.”
“Of course.” I shut my cell phone.
“Yeah.”
“Need, uh, more.”
“Yeah right, you can’t-.”
“Yes I can, that’s not a problem.”
“… fine. You know where to find me. Just leave the money there.”
“Of course.” I shut my cell phone.
.....
At around midnight that night, as I was walking to my destination down the street, I began thinking to myself. Why has Denzel screwed with my mind? Is he real? Am I really fucking insane? Do these dam pills even work?
I was a shadow in the night under the street lamps, walking through alley ways and avoiding the streets. My shadow followed me like a curse, it was long and thin, standing above me against all the brick walls.
…It was tall and thin. With long fingers… Always standing above me…
I found the specified alley way and walked to a back door. It was barred and locked. I slowly bent down and dropped the money on the doorstep. I stood and looked up at the tall barred door. It was spooky, a very dimly lit, spooky alley.
“Turn around.” A voice came from inside the door. I obeyed. Turning, I heard the door open behind me. I was scared and wanted so much to turn and see Kane. I shivered in the cold night and goose bumps arose when the door shut quietly behind me. I turned back around to see two pill bottles on the ground. I quickly picked them up and put them into my coat pocket.
Turning to go, someone’s hands went over my mouth and pulled me back. I heard a quick shuffle of footsteps and I kicked out in front of me, in shock. I shot my hands up to my mouth to try and pull the attackers hands from me. They held on tight. I then felt someone else’s hands reach into my pocket. I yelled a muffle “no”, but it barely could be heard.
“What’s this?” The man said, “drugs? Wouldn’t think a pretty girl like you would be into something like this. Then again, the prettiest always are.” I kicked my foot behind me, hitting one of the attacker’s in his groin. I heard him groan and he let go of me. I staggered forward then turned to face my attackers. The man who wasn’t on the ground rolling in pain was holding my two bottles.
“Give those back.” I said, slowly pulling out my cell phone, “I’ll call the cops. You know they’re only three blocks away.” The man on the ground stood up and they both laughed. I couldn’t make out a face, they both were shadowed by the walls surrounding us. The man on the left finally said, “you can’t dial it in time!” He ran at me and I screamed. I shut my eyes out of fear and turned my back to them. I kicked off from the ground behind me and I darted out from the alley. I took a left turn and ran into the covered doorstep of a small shop. I slid down onto the step and hugged my knees, scared. I didn’t know what to do.
A half hour had passed until I felt it safe to go back. I stood slowly and took a step out from the indented door. It was lightly raining, a fine mist. Cold. I turned to my right and walked slowly towards the alley. Before I turned into the alley, I saw something sparkle out of the corner of my eye. I looked down to my right to see the two pill bottles on the ground. I bent down and picked them up. I opened one to see if the pills were still in there, but instead of the tiny pink pills, a note has taken their place. I unrolled the note and it said, “You don’t need these”. Terrified, I dropped the bottles and ran back to my apartment. I was a fool to get involved with buying these drugs illegally in the first place. Now someone decided to play mind tricks on me.
I raced into my apartment, shut the door behind me, and leapt over the back of the couch and landed on it. I put my hands to the sides of my head, cupping my ears, and I cried. I rolled onto my side and stared into nothing for a long time. Afraid to move and afraid to breath, I fell asleep right there.
…..
At around midnight that night, as I was walking to my destination down the street, I began thinking to myself. Why has Denzel screwed with my mind? Is he real? Am I really fucking insane? Do these dam pills even work?
I was a shadow in the night under the street lamps, walking through alley ways and avoiding the streets. My shadow followed me like a curse, it was long and thin, standing above me against all the brick walls.
…It was tall and thin. With long fingers… Always standing above me…
I found the specified alley way and walked to a back door. It was barred and locked. I slowly bent down and dropped the money on the doorstep. I stood and looked up at the tall barred door. It was spooky, a very dimly lit, spooky alley.
“Turn around.” A voice came from inside the door. I obeyed. Turning, I heard the door open behind me. I was scared and wanted so much to turn and see Kane. I shivered in the cold night and goose bumps arose when the door shut quietly behind me. I turned back around to see two pill bottles on the ground. I quickly picked them up and put them into my coat pocket.
Turning to go, someone’s hands went over my mouth and pulled me back. I heard a quick shuffle of footsteps and I kicked out in front of me, in shock. I shot my hands up to my mouth to try and pull the attackers hands from me. They held on tight. I then felt someone else’s hands reach into my pocket. I yelled a muffle “no”, but it barely could be heard.
“What’s this?” The man said, “drugs? Wouldn’t think a pretty girl like you would be into something like this. Then again, the prettiest always are.” I kicked my foot behind me, hitting one of the attacker’s in his groin. I heard him groan and he let go of me. I staggered forward then turned to face my attackers. The man who wasn’t on the ground rolling in pain was holding my two bottles.
“Give those back.” I said, slowly pulling out my cell phone, “I’ll call the cops. You know they’re only three blocks away.” The man on the ground stood up and they both laughed. I couldn’t make out a face, they both were shadowed by the walls surrounding us. The man on the left finally said, “you can’t dial it in time!” He ran at me and I screamed. I shut my eyes out of fear and turned my back to them. I kicked off from the ground behind me and I darted out from the alley. I took a left turn and ran into the covered doorstep of a small shop. I slid down onto the step and hugged my knees, scared. I didn’t know what to do.
A half hour had passed until I felt it safe to go back. I stood slowly and took a step out from the indented door. It was lightly raining, a fine mist. Cold. I turned to my right and walked slowly towards the alley. Before I turned into the alley, I saw something sparkle out of the corner of my eye. I looked down to my right to see the two pill bottles on the ground. I bent down and picked them up. I opened one to see if the pills were still in there, but instead of the tiny pink pills, a note has taken their place. I unrolled the note and it said, “You don’t need these”. Terrified, I dropped the bottles and ran back to my apartment. I was a fool to get involved with buying these drugs illegally in the first place. Now someone decided to play mind tricks on me.
I raced into my apartment, shut the door behind me, and leapt over the back of the couch and landed on it. I put my hands to the sides of my head, cupping my ears, and I cried. I rolled onto my side and stared into nothing for a long time. Afraid to move and afraid to breath, I fell asleep right there.
…..
“Where have you gone, Denzel?” I asked, “Are you still with me?”
“…”
“Denzel.” I said, “Please answer me.”
My dream then came into perspective. The skulls all around me were so familiar. And there was Denzel again, standing on the pile in the distance, staring at his hand… All was the same as before. Then an overwhelming voice came over me and it said, “you broke me.”
“Denzel…” I said, “What did I do…? I’m so sorry…”
“I want to make your life hell.” He responded. My eyes widened, why this sudden change? Why is he so cruel now? “I want you to feel the pain you have given to me. I told you never to touch me.”
“Den-.”
“Roslyn.” He was quiet for a moment, “you are a fool. You have ruined the bond between demon and human. Between us. You are now a burden among me, a burden like none other.”
“Like you weren’t a burden to me!” I yelled, angered. Denzel stopped talking and he was completely silent. He then lowered his hand, from what I could see, and straightened himself.
“And dare you talk back to me now. Dare you do that to me.”
“Why the hell are you even here!” I cried, “I want answers! You’ve ruined my life!”
“And you’ve RUINED ME.” Denzel screamed. He screamed. He fucking screamed at me. It was completely different than I had ever experienced before. “I’ll give you the damn answers, Roslyn! I’ll give them to you!” He turned to face me, and, to my dismay, his face was still not visible. “I’ll give them to you. You sinned when you were young. You sinned. You sinned the biggest of them all.”
“No!” I yelled, “Stop, no.”
“STOP WHAT, ROSLYN?” He yelled, “STOP THE PAIN YOU CAUSED?
YOU KILLED YOUR PARENTS.” “No!!” I cried, the tears beginning to form under my eyes, “That’s not it! I di-!”
“THAT IS WHY I AM HERE.” He yelled. “THE DEVIL HIMSELF CHOSE ME TO MAKE YOUR LIFE HELL. YOU’RE SO LUCKY I HAVEN’T BEEN HARSH ON YOU. YOU’RE THE LOWEST OF THE LOW. YOU DON’T DESERVE YOUR LIFE!!!!”
I felt a rapid blast to my forehead and I was instantly in a trance. I was looking down into an alley way. The alley way that my parents and I used to walk down to get to the dinner club we had always attended on Friday evenings. I saw my parents walk into my view at the far end of the alley and they both were holding hands, my mother holding mine.
I was so innocent.
A block away from this place, an old, rusty car was racing onto the street where my parents were about to cross. From my view, I wanted to yell “Mom! Dad! Roslyn, STOP!” But I couldn’t get the words out. I could only watch.
The car stopped at the end of the alley and three men got out. They pulled out a black gun and held it up to my father. He then yelled, behind his black, cloth mask, “wallet, now!” My father reaches into his pocket slowly and while he pulls out his wallet from his hundred dollar vest, he says, “easy now boys, we don’t want any trouble. Here’s everything I have, take it.” The man holding the gun takes the wallet hurriedly and then says, “The watch too! And the woman’s pearls!” My mom lets go of my hand and she takes her necklace off and, trembling, holds it out to the men. The man points his gun at my father and he takes the pearls from my mother. Being a sneaky criminal, he also slides my mother’s wedding ring off her finger. He then takes my father’s watch and throws it to one of his allies.
“Please,” my father then said, “take it easy. That’s all we have.”
“The girl!” The man pointed his gun to me and I hid behind my mother’s leg. My mother took her hand and put it on my head and she said, “no, please, no. Just leave, you have everything.”
“The girl, lady!”
“No!”
I was too afraid to watch at such a young age, so all I could see was darkness as I heard the bullet shot echo through the alley way. Then, I fell to the ground, my mother collapsed on top of me. I screamed at the top of my lungs for just a moment until the bad man yelled, “Shut up, you twit!” He pointed the gun at my father and said, “don’t move! Tell me girl to come to us! And if she doesn’t shut up, she’s dead!” He looked towards innocent little me and said, “So shut up! One word from you and…” My eyes began to water as I crawled out from under the staggered-breathed mother.
My dad then ran at the man with all his force and tackled him to the ground. The gun slid to my small, young feet. I picked it up, wide-eyed and stupid. My father and the men were struggling and fighting each other, then my father yelled, “shoot him, Roslyn! I love you!” I held up the gun, aimed, and…
I shot him. I shot him all right. I shot him right in his chest.
The three men scampered away, scared of the sirens getting louder and closer.
My mother lay to my right, bleeding to death on the ground, surrounded by that red, terrifying stench. My father lay on the ground in front of me, a bullet through his chest. I see my father twitching on the ground, trying to speak, but only spitting up blood.
“Daddy?” I look at the gun in my hands, then dropped it onto the ground next to my mother. I walked to my father and knelt next to him in his blood. “Daddy? Don’t do that, what’s wrong, I’m so scared…”
I was such a burden to them, and they died protecting me.
…..
I was brought back from my trance and the first thing I was greeted by was Denzel yelling, “HE DIDN’T LOVE YOU. HOW COULD HE LOVE YOU WHEN YOU KILLED THEM BOTH? HOW CAN YOU LOVE ANYONE?”
“Denzel!” I broke down into tears and fell to my knees, crushing the skulls beneath me.
“YOU KISSED ME, YOU FOOL.” Denzel yelled into the barren landscape, “YOU MURDERED YOURSELF. YOU MURDERED ME.”
“…”
“Denzel.” I said, “Please answer me.”
My dream then came into perspective. The skulls all around me were so familiar. And there was Denzel again, standing on the pile in the distance, staring at his hand… All was the same as before. Then an overwhelming voice came over me and it said, “you broke me.”
“Denzel…” I said, “What did I do…? I’m so sorry…”
“I want to make your life hell.” He responded. My eyes widened, why this sudden change? Why is he so cruel now? “I want you to feel the pain you have given to me. I told you never to touch me.”
“Den-.”
“Roslyn.” He was quiet for a moment, “you are a fool. You have ruined the bond between demon and human. Between us. You are now a burden among me, a burden like none other.”
“Like you weren’t a burden to me!” I yelled, angered. Denzel stopped talking and he was completely silent. He then lowered his hand, from what I could see, and straightened himself.
“And dare you talk back to me now. Dare you do that to me.”
“Why the hell are you even here!” I cried, “I want answers! You’ve ruined my life!”
“And you’ve RUINED ME.” Denzel screamed. He screamed. He fucking screamed at me. It was completely different than I had ever experienced before. “I’ll give you the damn answers, Roslyn! I’ll give them to you!” He turned to face me, and, to my dismay, his face was still not visible. “I’ll give them to you. You sinned when you were young. You sinned. You sinned the biggest of them all.”
“No!” I yelled, “Stop, no.”
“STOP WHAT, ROSLYN?” He yelled, “STOP THE PAIN YOU CAUSED?
YOU KILLED YOUR PARENTS.” “No!!” I cried, the tears beginning to form under my eyes, “That’s not it! I di-!”
“THAT IS WHY I AM HERE.” He yelled. “THE DEVIL HIMSELF CHOSE ME TO MAKE YOUR LIFE HELL. YOU’RE SO LUCKY I HAVEN’T BEEN HARSH ON YOU. YOU’RE THE LOWEST OF THE LOW. YOU DON’T DESERVE YOUR LIFE!!!!”
I felt a rapid blast to my forehead and I was instantly in a trance. I was looking down into an alley way. The alley way that my parents and I used to walk down to get to the dinner club we had always attended on Friday evenings. I saw my parents walk into my view at the far end of the alley and they both were holding hands, my mother holding mine.
I was so innocent.
A block away from this place, an old, rusty car was racing onto the street where my parents were about to cross. From my view, I wanted to yell “Mom! Dad! Roslyn, STOP!” But I couldn’t get the words out. I could only watch.
The car stopped at the end of the alley and three men got out. They pulled out a black gun and held it up to my father. He then yelled, behind his black, cloth mask, “wallet, now!” My father reaches into his pocket slowly and while he pulls out his wallet from his hundred dollar vest, he says, “easy now boys, we don’t want any trouble. Here’s everything I have, take it.” The man holding the gun takes the wallet hurriedly and then says, “The watch too! And the woman’s pearls!” My mom lets go of my hand and she takes her necklace off and, trembling, holds it out to the men. The man points his gun at my father and he takes the pearls from my mother. Being a sneaky criminal, he also slides my mother’s wedding ring off her finger. He then takes my father’s watch and throws it to one of his allies.
“Please,” my father then said, “take it easy. That’s all we have.”
“The girl!” The man pointed his gun to me and I hid behind my mother’s leg. My mother took her hand and put it on my head and she said, “no, please, no. Just leave, you have everything.”
“The girl, lady!”
“No!”
I was too afraid to watch at such a young age, so all I could see was darkness as I heard the bullet shot echo through the alley way. Then, I fell to the ground, my mother collapsed on top of me. I screamed at the top of my lungs for just a moment until the bad man yelled, “Shut up, you twit!” He pointed the gun at my father and said, “don’t move! Tell me girl to come to us! And if she doesn’t shut up, she’s dead!” He looked towards innocent little me and said, “So shut up! One word from you and…” My eyes began to water as I crawled out from under the staggered-breathed mother.
My dad then ran at the man with all his force and tackled him to the ground. The gun slid to my small, young feet. I picked it up, wide-eyed and stupid. My father and the men were struggling and fighting each other, then my father yelled, “shoot him, Roslyn! I love you!” I held up the gun, aimed, and…
I shot him. I shot him all right. I shot him right in his chest.
The three men scampered away, scared of the sirens getting louder and closer.
My mother lay to my right, bleeding to death on the ground, surrounded by that red, terrifying stench. My father lay on the ground in front of me, a bullet through his chest. I see my father twitching on the ground, trying to speak, but only spitting up blood.
“Daddy?” I look at the gun in my hands, then dropped it onto the ground next to my mother. I walked to my father and knelt next to him in his blood. “Daddy? Don’t do that, what’s wrong, I’m so scared…”
I was such a burden to them, and they died protecting me.
…..
I was brought back from my trance and the first thing I was greeted by was Denzel yelling, “HE DIDN’T LOVE YOU. HOW COULD HE LOVE YOU WHEN YOU KILLED THEM BOTH? HOW CAN YOU LOVE ANYONE?”
“Denzel!” I broke down into tears and fell to my knees, crushing the skulls beneath me.
“YOU KISSED ME, YOU FOOL.” Denzel yelled into the barren landscape, “YOU MURDERED YOURSELF. YOU MURDERED ME.”
…..
I woke up in a panic. I was lying on the ground next to the same couch and a newly broken coffee table. Did I flail and land on it during me… dream?
I sat up in hysterics and leapt back onto the couch. The room was cold. It was very cold again…
I woke up in a panic. I was lying on the ground next to the same couch and a newly broken coffee table. Did I flail and land on it during me… dream?
I sat up in hysterics and leapt back onto the couch. The room was cold. It was very cold again…
